Dostoevsky To Make Rare Appearance

 Fyodor Dostoevsky, presumed dead for over a century, has consented to a rare and extraordinary appearance at the Red Books bookstore in Balto this weekend to field questions about his 130-year disappearance and sign copies of his latest book, “The Idiot II.” Dostoevsky, who gained passing notice in Russia for his brooding cynicism and uncanny resemblance to Rasputin, is perhaps best known for his acclaimed work, The Brothers Karamazov, which features an aging buffoon with three kids and a bastard. That work, recently described as “a modern day Flubug” by Roger Kieves, stage director at the Brackwater State Correctional Institution Playhouse, will be discussed at length by the indefatigable author but will not overshadow his latest offering.

“Idiot II is an amazing piece of work,” said Babs Stricklen, known socialist and talent scout for the secular, atheist-funded red flag bookstore adbookstore. “And it stands on its own right. It also comes at a pivotal time in our nation’s history. True, it may have taken longer than his other books, perhaps longer than anyone thought possible, but exceptional writers often take years to produce quality work. Just look at Clive Cussler.”

Dostoevsky will sign purchased copies of his Idiot II between dialysis treatments from 2pm to 4pm at the Red Books bookstore at the center of Influenza Square in downtown Balto. Attendees are advised to arrive early, especially if the Badgers-Falcons game is rained out.

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